Is a dream a lie if it don't come true or is it something worse
-"The River"

Originally scheduled for a release in the fall of 1979, Bruce Springsteen's fifth album The River finally saw release in October 1980. The massive double album isn't perfect but as I grow older and venture further into adulthood, more than any other collection of songs in Springsteen's cannon, I return to this one the most. It helps I viewed it as his most flawed record for the better part of a few decades. Coming off the Darkness tour in January 1979, Springsteen wasted no time in writing with fervor. The 1978 tour had seen the debut of a half dozen songs and one would assume that only a few other songs would be needed. For most artists this would suffice, but not for Springsteen. He wrote and wrote and wrote until he had about thirty new compositions. The E Street Band recorded all of them and an album, entitled The Ties That Bind was penciled in for release later that year. The album went so far as to have potential album covers and track listings drawn up, but Springsteen pulled the record back feeling it needed something more. In early 1980, it was determined that the album would be a double. Over sixty songs were recorded for The River and for my money, this was not just Springsteen's most productive period, but his best as well. Shifting between tracks that embody dreams and nightmares, The River is Bruce Springsteen's most bipolar collection of songs, yet it's also his most miraculous creation of songs.

Let's start by making one thing very clear, no double album is perfect. Anytime you have a double disc affair, it begins with debates about how immense a single album would have been and no album, despite how legendary, goes without questioning; The White Album, Quadrophenia, Use Your Illusion, The Mellon Collie and Infinite Sadness, Physical Graffiti and Sandinista! . The River is no different and as time has passed (and more tracks from these sessions are officially released) people tend to wonder how a song like "Crush On You" made the cut and "Where The Bands Are" didn't. Regardless of my (and thousands of others fans) whining, Springsteen made a grand, illustrious and profound double disc. Why did he? Because he had no other choice. The Ties That Bind may have housed a more inclusive and succinct album, but the vastness and variety of The River make it one of the most compelling albums of the last thirty-years. Springsteen makes a wide variety of music and he left off many of the poppier songs from Darkness and to do so two bleak albums in a row would have been too grim. For every Good Friday, there has to be an Easter Sunday and Springsteen thankfully acknowledged that while rock n' roll has the power to unearth dark secrets, it can also be a baptism bringing a renewed sense of faith. He also stretched back to his teen years to the music he grew up and loved. He made peace with himself that songs do not always have to carry an emotional depth to them. A great rock n' roll song isn't defined by its subject matter but by how it engages its listener and Springsteen manages to shift between the dumb and desolate better on The River than at any other point in his career.

While the themes of The River don't flow as mightily as they did on Born To Run or Darkness, the most aggressive and risky nature and sequencing make The River a rare delicacy; highlighting lightness and darkness equally. Finding middle ground between the despair of Darkness and the triumphant glee of Born To Run, The River melds the Friday night escapism with brutal truths. What makes each of Springsteen's albums during this time essential is that he wrote from experienced and as he aged so did his audience. For the younger listeners who would discover the music later in life, each album encompasses a guide that makes more sense and becomes clearer with every passing year of our lives.The River has two distinct and split personalities; driving and mindless garage rock ("Crush On You", "You Can Look (But Better Not Touch)", and stark pronouncements where characters wail about failure, doom and death ("Point Blank", "Jackson Cage"). On paper, the album appears disjointed as it tries to connect two severe styles…and it is, but what a superb and ambitious mess it is.

Ever since Springsteen had become a live performer, he filled his set with numerous covers, mostly during the opening and closing of his shows. Whether it was intentional or not, the rockers on this record take part in the shared past of rock n' roll with clashing guitars, raw intimacy and a band with brazen confidence led by Steve Van Zandt. What differentiates The River from previous Springsteen releases was how they finally unearthed the joy, drive and exuberance of their live performances. Darkness on the Edge of Town is a remarkable album but I have always felt its legacy was hindered by its aural sonics. The difference between the live versions and the studio cuts is immense. On The River the E Street Band delivers this material as if they were screaming murder. Right from the thunderclap opening of "The Ties That Bind" to the album's gloomy closer, "Wreck On The Highway", the band is relentless, slamming and subtle in all the right spots. The truth is that Bruce's music is at its best with the band behind him, especially Steve Van Zandt leading the troops. He centered the band and during this time, the E Street Band performed with brazen confidence in a way I'm not sure would ever be replicated in the same way again.

Drawing influences from books and films, Springsteen wrote, recorded and sequenced The River like a film, meticulously editing every scene to create a larger whole. "The Ties That Bind" is a profound song speaking to the heart of the matter advising the listener to not hide behind a collected and cool attitude, it's better to take a chance on love than to let pride get in the way. Aural giddiness reigns supreme on "Sherry Darling", "I'm A Rocker" and "Ramrod", the latter two find the E Street Band delivering pure adrenaline rock. "Out In The Street" and "Cadillac Ranch" are pure Friday night escapism with exuberant getaway choruses. Some may dismiss these as power pop that is insular, but there is an art to creating big beats and booming choruses over a pop framework. The resignation of life in "Jackson Cage" is paired with an angry and aggressive in-your-face delivery while the resurrecting "Two Hearts" finds redemption in the search for a better life. The album's biggest hit (and Springsteen's first top-ten hit) "Hungry Heart" is giddy yet one in-depth look at the lyrics, you come to the realization that the chorus isn't as sunny as one thought. Father-son struggles arise once again "Independence Day"; a solemn resignation of two personalities who were simultaneously different but the same. There is a lamenting loss of a love on the soulful "Fade Away" and the brutal cinematic resignation of truth found on "The River" where the characters surrender to life's hardships.

The album's more somber tunes penetrate the psyche making you identify with it in ways that are purely honest. The stark minimalism of "Stolen Car" echoes the narrator's outlook. It's a tale of a couple who once committed true love to one another but time has found them on opposite sides of the world. The narrator takes up stealing cars in the hope he's caught, but he never is. As a result, he feels his life swirl into an inescapable wasteland. He desperately needs to feel something, but doesn't know how to attain it. The loss of something or someone drives people to extreme measures. The accompanying music is so void of colors, it's haunting. Spare piano, keyboards and minimal drums adds to its lingering atmosphere. This is a character trying to break out and make his mark, but can't. He's trapped by his own loneliness, something that no matter how many stolen cars of lovers he encounters, he'll never satiate.

On the album's final three tracks, the characters find doom, but they slowly come to a realization. Up until now, Springsteen's work has dealt with defiance, dreams and desolation. "The Price You Pay" finds that character who got into the car on "Thunder Road" and "Born To Run" facing strife in their dreams but who is still defiant. "Drive All Night" finds the narrator proclaiming his love amidst a world that is hard, but his drive to find a home in his lover's arms is a turning point. He has not resigned from life even if his dreams have been destroyed. Instead of letting life get the best of him, he finds that one thing that can save him…love. His wailing at the end of this epic 8-minute track says it all, "You've got, you've got my, my love…heart and soul". The album closes with "Wreck On The Highway", a dour sounding nightmare. The main character witnesses an auto accident and is haunted by it. Springsteen summed it up best in his 1998 book Songs, "He drives home (after witnessing the accident), and lying awake that night next to his lover, he realizes that you have a limited number of opportunities to love someone, to do your work, to be part of something, to parent your children, to do something good". OnThe River, some of these characters begin to process their situation and attempt to make the best of it, despite the cards they have been dealt. There is a profound bravery in living your life and not resigning from it or running away from it.

Bruce Springsteen lives inside the shoes of the characters on The River and one of the reasons people are so attached to his music is because his paintings are personal and profound. In college, I spent half of my free time in a car. When I wasn't commuting to and from school, I was seeking. What was I in search of? I don't know…but I felt there were answers in book stores, record stores, the night and most importantly the open road. I was lonely and felt like I was placed on a world where no one understood me. Like the characters of this final trilogy of songs on The River, I had to come to the realization that like these characters, I too had deep fears and broken dreams. But I felt that inside these albums, there were answers and lessons for me to divulge. It took time, but like that character in "Wreck on the Highway", I decided to live. My time is not infinite and everyday I spent wallowing about past heartaches and the stagnant present, I was missing out on making my dreams a reality.

Life's lessons are sometimes best taught by embracing both the lightness and the darkness life has to offer. Springsteen's Catholic upbringing shows a tinge of influence here because the more desolate characters ("The Price You Pay", "Independence Day", "The River") follow Good Friday ideologies while the optimistic ones ("I Wanna Marry You", "Two Hearts", "Drive All Night") find solace on Easter Sunday. Through the dichotomy of these two extremes, I found middle ground and a path for myself. When I was despondent these characters comforted me, when I was content I found something to grin at and during my darkest hour, I was reminded that I hold the keys to my own cage. The River takes you on a treacherous and exultant expedition that is full of harrowing and beguiling music whose cumulative effect provides the listener with a widescreen cinematic experience. Birth, death, renewal and resurrection all have expansive roles allowing the listener to identify; the toughest task an artist has and one Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band succeeded wildly at. Throughout all of the album's peaks and valleys, upon its completion, you almost feel that credits should roll in a darkened theater. Bruce Springsteen has made more cohesive and better thematic albums, but none give the listener a more wide-ranging experience of dreams and nightmares as The River. The twenty-songs that encompass The River take the listener on a journey that is arduous as it is blissful and redeeming and makes you not just contemplate about what you heard, but hopefully come to the consciousness that is ain't no sin to be glad you're alive.