Shattuck, the longtime leader of pop-punk outfit The Muffs, announced the move via her social media channels with this message: "Super disappointed to learn that my time with the Pixies ended today. Amazing experience. Looking forward to focusing my attention back on the Muffs and our upcoming new album. All the best to everyone."

With an extensive tour scheduled for the beginning of the year, the Pixies can't waste any time looking for a replacement. So, we decided to lend a hand and offer up some possibilities to take over for Deal and Shattuck.

And since they will apparently only hire musicians with the same first name, we spent time sweating over the supercomputers at Radio.com headquarters, punching in algorithms, and weighing some potentially earth-shaking selections (Kim Kardashian? Kim Jong Un? Kimmy Gibbler from Full House?) before finally coming up with five potential options to fill the gaping hole in Pixies' lineup. In our most wildly speculative 5 Directions series yet, here's our suggestions:

1) Kim Gordon: This choice might seem a little too on the nose, that's why she's our number one pick. Like the Pixies, Kim Gordon survived the rise and fall of the post-Nevermind alt-rock explosion with her dignity intact, and she knows quite well how to handle a band full of alpha males thanks to her long tenure in Sonic Youth. If her bass playing chops don't convince you, think about the breathy sexuality that her voice would bring to songs like "Gigantic" or "U-Mass." Try as she might, Kim Deal could never make a listener weak in the knees like Gordon can.

2) Kim Coletta: Another female bassist that has logged time in a band full of dudes (in her case, the pioneering D.C. post-punk quartet Jawbox), Coletta's strength lies in the meaty tone she wrests out of a bass guitar, one that would sound so nice sandwiched between the slashing chords ripped out by Pixies' guitarists Joey Santiago and Black Francis. She also makes some of the most awesome bass faces this side of Este Haim.