Avril Ashlee Cloning?
04/01/2008
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(Dolly Doppelganger) J. Craig Venter PhD, distinguished biologist & founder of the Institute for Geonomic Research, began a quest when after being exposed to the musical favorites of his 13 year-old daughter. He was puzzled when he discovered that the various songs were performed by different singers, because he thought they sounded so much alike. Intrigued he began research to single out a pop gene, which gave today's pop stars their similar nature, but he was not ready for the shocking discovery that he ultimately made.This shocking discovery threatens to destroy the universe as we know it, and lay waste to an entire system of thought that until now had gone unchallenged. Venter discovered that Ashlee Simpson and Avril Lavigne are a perfect DNA match, as a result, on the molecular level, they are really the same person. Joe $imp$0n was unavailable for comment at this time. Sources close to the troubled $imp$on family hinted that at the first whisper of fame & fortune, Joe had all his kids cloned, in case there was ever a demand for more $imp$ons that the first born $imp$ons were unable to meet.
Allegedly, after Ashlee's SNL fiasco, the Avril clone was unleashed on Canada, with a made up family & bio. Representatives for the $imp$ons, Avril, and the National Mutton Council all deny this allegation. Stay tuned & see what unfolds!! - more on this story 
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