Is it a hit, *hit or miss?

American Hair Bands Vol. 1  by Scott Slapp

American Hair Bands Vol. 1 
Label: Versailles 
Hit, *hit or Miss?:  Miss
Rating: 

The first thing I thought when I was handed this CD to review was “Do we really need another tribute album? To hair bands nonetheless?” Then my better demons took over and I thought, “what the hell, this could be fun.” 

The Fakes kick things off with their take on Motley Crue’s “Live Wire” which sounds like what you might get if a bad punk band recorded the tune with Marilyn Manson. It has it’s own charm but I hate to say it, it makes the original sounds better in comparison. 

I was never a big Van Hagar fan. Sammy’s voice never tripped my trigger but I have to hand it to Richard Kendrick, he really pulled off a convincing cover of “When It’s Love”. I can barely tell the difference between this version and the original with the exception that the guitar leads are a bit better than Eddie’s. Richard throws in a few extra flourishes to showcase his talent and it surprisingly works well. 

Cage next give the Priest classic “Freewheel Burning” a semi-speedmetal make over and I’ll be damned if it doesn’t kick major ass! Now this is how covers are supposed to be done. This actually got me interested in checking out Cage’s three original studio albums. It’s too bad the rest of the album doesn’t contain covers as good as this one. In fact, in some ways this sounds like Maiden covering Priest especially during the instrumental bridge. 

My first reaction to the next track was “What the f***?”. Hangin’ with Keavin and aG here at iconoFAN I’ve heard more than my fair share of Enuff Z’nuff and to be honest, they have made me a convert. So I like to think I’m pretty familiar with the EZN sound but I didn’t recognize any elements of EZN in this. There is no way in hell the vocals here are Donnie Vie’s, it sounds like Chip recorded this one at half speed and then speeded the tape up.  It’s a shame because I’ve loved other covers EZN have done but this just flat-out sucks. No question about it. I guess they needed the cash but hell guys please don’t do this again! 

Wanna hear a garage band covering Def Leppard’s “Photograph”?  Then listen to this one by Straightjacket Smile. It sounds like they tracked the song and didn’t have enough cash left over to hire a decent mixer. The levels are all screwed up and the lead and rhythm guitars blare out in uneven stereo. What’s worst are the back up vocals that miss the last note in the chorus and sound like they are cut short. With better mixing this would actually be pretty cool but it sounds like amateur hour with the way it is presented here.  Plus the vocalist of Straightjacket Smile doesn’t have the pips that even come close to Joe Elliot’s and let’s not forget the production genius of Mutt Lange. A half hearted attempt at best. 

Jizzy Pearl checks in next and makes up for some of the weak tracks that came before with his cool cover of the Cult’s “Fire Women”. Not as good as the original but still a decent cover. 

Cookie delivers another bad punk cover with their rendition of “I Hate Myself (For Loving You). Actually this might work if the vocals matched the music but the singer sounds like Vixen jamming with G.B.H. plus she doesn’t really sing, kind of talks her way through the song. Maybe she has been listening to Kelly Osbourne's abortion of an album? Needless to say, it doesn’t work at all. 

Premonition checks in next with a hard edged cover of the Ozzy classic “I Don’t Know”. This cover is one of the saving graces of this disc. Premonition does a pretty good job here and by kicking things up a bit heavier they make the track their own while not disrespecting the original. 

I have to say the Cult covers featured on this disc are all top notch. Gilby Clarke offers a cool interpretation of “Wild Flower”. He’s not the vocalist that Ian is but he does a pretty good job and doesn’t butcher the song the way some of the other artists do on this disc. 

I had to go listen to the original Twisted Sister version of “Under The Blade” since I wasn’t familiar with it. Let’s just saw American Dog’s take on the song is a bit Rocky Horror meets Motorhead and Accept.  I can’t figure out if I love this track or hate it. I feel compelled to listen to it over and over to sort out an opinion one way or the other. 

O.C.D.’s version of “I Love the Dead” from the Alice Cooper classic album Billion Dollar Babies is just flat out weird.  Did someone uncover some early Marilyn Manson demo tapes here? 

I actually saw Paul Shortino in his cover band a few weeks ago and was really impressed with his vocals so I saw this track on the cd cover and said a little prayer of thanks to the rock gods. Paul teamed up with Jimmy Crespo to record this cover of The Cult’s “Sweet Soul Sister”. I was a little curious about why this disc featured so many Cult songs and was told that the record company that put this disc out had previously released a tribute CD to the Cult.  I have since checked out that CD and I have to say I found it much more appealing than this collection since it sounded like all of the bands on that disc were high caliber and took the job seriously. This track is no exception. It’s rock solid. 

I never thought of Thin Lizzy as a hair band so I am a bit confused why there is a cover of one of their tracks here. I understood after listening to the track, it was included to help save the disc. It’s not the world’s best cover but it’s not the worst. If I were in a club watching this band, Southern Rock Allstars, playing this song I’m sure I’d be rockin’ out. 

BFE selected one of the most difficult Aerosmith tracks to cover with Sweet Emotion. It starts out strong with the music hitting every note perfectly and the harmonies only missing their mark by a fraction but the lead vocals just don’t work. It sounds like Nashville Pussy doing a drunken’ cover of Aerosmith. Scary thought I know but listen to this song and you’ll hear what I’m talking about. 

Jet Black Joy comes on strong with an interesting cover of Van Halen’s “Ain’t Talkin’ About Love”. I know I should hate this song but it’s kind of fun hearing a band that sounds like they are stuck in the middle of the hair band heyday doing a cover of 70’s era VH.  This sounds like it could be any number of third-rate 80’s hair rockers like Faster Pussy Cat, Danger Danger etc. It’s still fun since it really epitomizes hair bands. 

Rule number one when doing AC/DC covers, you may be able to copy the music note for note but unless you have a gravely voice like Bon Scott’s PLEASE DON’T ATTEMPT TO COVER HIM!  This sounds like a third rate cover of a band covering Buckcherry covering AC/DC. Not to diss Buckcherry, Josh Todd could definitely pull this off but this band Crash & Burn live up to their name and really crash and burn with this terrible cover. 

I have a suspicion that the producer of this album really hates hair metal deep down as this final track will go down in history as one of the worst covers since Limp Bizkit’s take on “Faith”, Britney Spears ungodly butcher job on “Satisfaction” and Madonna’s utterly terrible cover of “American Pie”. 

Imagine a bad rap-metal band covering Motley Crue. You don’t have to imagine it, just  listen to this cover of “Shout at the Devil” by G-Soul. The guitars parts are ok but the rapping of the verses are just flat-out lame. Maybe if I was a rap fan I might like this but to me it’s ranks right up there as one of the worst moments in music. 

I don’t know who I would recommend this disc to. If you’re a fan of hair metal you might enjoy it but the strong moments are too overshadowed by the weak moments and the best tracks appear on other tribute albums put out by this record company. 

Another major problem with this disc is it’s called “American Hair Bands” but half of the bands covered here are not from America???? 

They labeled this disc Vol. 1, I hope they do a better job lining up covers for Vol. 2 as I would give this half-hearted attempt a D-. 
 

Tracks: Live Wire - The Fakes  When It's Love - Richard Kendrick  Freewheel Burning - Cage  Yankee Rose - Enuff Znuff  Photograph - Straitjacket Smile  Fire Woman - Jizzy Pearl  I Hate Myself (For Loving You) - Cookie  I Don't Know - Premonition  Wild Flower - Gilby Clarke  Under The Blade - American Dog  I Love The Dead - O.C.D.  Sweet Soul Sister - Jimmy Crespo  Don't Believe A Word - Southern Rock Allstars  Sweet Emotion - BFE  Ain't Talkin' Bout Love - Jet Black  Highway To Hell - Crash & Burn  Shout At The Devil - G-Soul

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